LOS ANGELES—With a clear mind now available to focus on something other than finding creative hiding spots for her liquor supply, publishing executive Katie Spencer, told reporters on Monday that there was enough wiggle room in her schedule to stick her nose into other people’s business. “Now that I’ve come out my drunken stupor I can do some interrogating and really help other people see the error in hiding huge secrets that eat away at them,” said the nosey wife and mother of one.
Spencer decided to set her sights on local weasel Ridge Forrester, a man she suspected was harboring a very big secret after a former urologist of Mr. Forrester made the regrettable choice of discussing his ex-patient’s zero sperm count medical history with Mrs. Spencer one afternoon after they happened to cross paths in a popular LA restaurant.
Spencer went on to note that initially Mr. Forrester’s explanations didn’t add up, but with a little resilience and a heavy application of bait and switch questioning she was eventually able to uncover the truth.
At press time, Mrs. Spencer had succeeded in manipulating Mr. and Mrs. Forrester into reluctantly admitting the true paternity of their son Douglas Forrester. “The truth shall set you free,” she announced while making a mental note to do more good works like this one in the future.