It really sucks to be Lily Romalati right now. Though she’s neck and neck with Noah for this year’s To Hell & Back award, I believe the majority of her problems can easily be remedied by simply adding an extra 300-500 calories of fiber to her daily diet.  Hopefully this might help that stick up her butt to pass. For someone who has cruised for older men online, contracted an STD from having unprotected sex and got married all before the tender age of 18, you would think she’d be a bit more open minded about her husband’s proclivity for porn.
I’m not surprised that Daniel got so addicted so fast, with a wife like Lily who can blame him? It’s obvious she wears the pants in the relationship. Even more obvious is the fact that these two need to get a D-I-V-O-R-C-E.
Know who else needs to get a divorce? Victoria and Brad. Thank god she finally got her head out the clouds and gave him the pink slip. Now she’ll have even more time to meet JT at the loft, the coffee house, the Athletic Club and the basketball court. Did I miss anything out? It’s a good thing Victor left Neil in charge because if it were up to Victoria, Newman Enterprises would be going to hell in a hand basket right now. If she’s not calling JT to meet her for lunch or some such other rendezvous then she’s tottering about the office fantasizing about meeting him. Herein lies the problem with Victoria Newman—moderation is not her strong-suit. Wait till Colleen finds out her step-mom is doing her ex-boyfriend. Again. It’s all so incestuous, don’t you think?
That Gloria sure is the marrying kind. Thank god, TPTB spared us months of watching Gloria pick out floral arrangements and ice sculptures and fast forwarded right to a civil ceremony in Michael and Lauren’s living room. How tacky, how absolutely Gloria.
They say the only man a woman can count on is her son and I’m sure Gloria would agree. Where would her half-baked schemes be without Kevin to carry them out? It was really hilarious to see Kevin approach the models and stagehands of Extreme Catwalk and offer to pay them $50 for their saliva. Latham is a comedic genius when it comes to the madcap Baldwins.
Extreme Catwalk turned out to be a hot mess. First of all why would they shoot a fashion reality show in a members-only country club? Second, why was a cameraman shooting footage inside the model’s changing tent? Isn’t that a violation of privacy? Then, to make it even more inconceivable, the contestant who most resembles a street walker won the opportunity to represent the financially unstable Jabot Cosmetics. John Abbot would be rolling over in his grave right now if only he were actually in it.
